5 simple ways to reduce painful feelings

Happiness happens when a person experiences three times as many positive emotions as negative emotions (or more). Building up positive emotions is reasonably simple. But how do you reduce the negative emotions like sadness, anger and anxiety that so easily undermine them?

Here are some simple tips, based on research and my experience:

1. Notice negative thoughts or feelings. Sounds simple, but it works. You can count them, put a rubber band on your wrist and snap it when you realize you’re having one or simply say to yourself ‘that was a negative thought’. Research shows that simply noticing you’re having a thought that ma
kes you feel bad is enough to decrease them
2. Accept negative feelings. Again, a very simple sounding technique but one that I’ve found amazingly effective. This involves not panicking, but just feeling the feelings. I say to myself ‘just feel it’. This stops me catastrophizing about feeling bad, which makes the bad feelings spiral out of control. It also stops me trying to deny that I’m feeling bad, which usually makes me feel worse.
3. Do something. As long as it’s not self-destructive, doing almost anything will lift your spirits and reduce negative emotions

4. Exercise. A brilliant, free way to reduce negative emotions. A walk, swim or workout can not only distract you but change you physically, so you feel less sadness, anxiety or anger.

5. Spend time with people. Make sure they’re people you actually like and get on with or you could feel worse! But this is a very effective way to

lift your spirits.

What makes you feel better when you’re feeling down or worried or irritable or any other kind of negative emotion?