Accepting negative emotions leads to more positive emotions

In my experience of transforming depression into happiness one of the most counter-intuitive techniques I've discovered is simply accepting the bad feelings. Before I discovered this I would put a lot of effort into trying to change my emotions when I felt bad - by doing cognitive work, planning activities, doing something enjoyable, getting bright light or exercising. Or all of the above! It was exhausting and frustrating - sometimes it worked, and sometimes it didn't.


For many years I worked hard at feeling better. Then one day it occurred to me that maybe if I just accepted my feelings they would ebb and flow and reach a natural level that was more positive. To my surprise, this turned out to be true. When I felt a negative feeling - whether depression, anger, irritation or worry - I simply took a deep breath, thought 'I'm feeling this' and let it go. I found that I felt much more relaxed, less driven and stressed about 'making' myself feel good. I also found that in the next hour or few my emotions became much more positive.